If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

A muslim walks into a gun shop

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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