Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

What is a jew in space? Dead

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...