Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Andoni was here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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