Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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What's 1+1? 69.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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