Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

pobody's nerfect

123 f*ck off

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...