Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

Fat? Jesse Z

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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