Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

thumb_up thumb_down -21

You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call an arab ?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Alfa Kurtoo change his name? Just say Alfa Kurtoo fast!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

thumb_up thumb_down -25

2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops