Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops