What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

thumb_up thumb_down

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

thumb_up thumb_down

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

thumb_up thumb_down

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

thumb_up thumb_down

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops