Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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SEX

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Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies into a box? Put them into a blender.

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What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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How do you get Pikachu on a Bus? Pikachu Is A Fictional Charecter.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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What did the Woman say to the man after he walked into the pole? That was a pole you idiot

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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69

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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