It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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