Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

knock knock who's there? pizza man ok

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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