Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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