who is really lanky? james cornish

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was younger, he was made fun of by all the bigger numbers. Everyday after school he would go home and wonder why he was made fun of. Was it his looks? How tall he was? The pain and suffering never stopped. He thought of suicide every day he got home from school. One day his mom got home from work and found 6 bleeding in the shower. She thought he was dead. She hurried him to the hospital where he was barely kept alive. After months of recovery, he started going back to school. The bullying never stopped, they started calling him a loser who should have died. He got older and depressed as a teenager. He got ahold of alcohol and began drinking. He went to meetings and got over his addiction. 10 years later he meets up with 7. It takes him back to his horrible childhood with the big numbers. Every time 6 sees 7, he gets reminded of everything. 7 had also murdered someone in front of 6.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

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A man is at the dentists. The dentists says, "Oh my, your teeth are terrible!" The man says, "Yes I know. I am addicted to Meth".

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What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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You know what's funny? Rape

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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