Yo momma so ugly that she is unpleasant to look at

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Whats cold and frozen? ice

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops