Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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