Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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