What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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