There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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