Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

Flowers are colors Love me

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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