Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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cool

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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TRICERATOPS!

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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