A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Justin Bieber.

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

A Palestinian woman walks into a library. She is promptly stoned to death.

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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