I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the kindergartener crying in the corner? His family was poor and his father abused him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I LIKE TRAINS

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

thumb_up thumb_down

What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops