what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Why did the blonde walk into the bar? To get a beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Jesus Christ

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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Why can't black guys eat babby back ribs... Beacause They are black too

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops