What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

Dick Cheney That's the joke

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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