What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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What Do call a dog with an e A doge

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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