What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

A hill billy went fishing

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

Whats green? The color green.

Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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