What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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If Tiger Woods is Asian and Black what is he? A golfer!

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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