A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

Grace Ackerson

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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