What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Knock Knock! F*ck off

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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Dumb

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Road Kill Penguins.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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