What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Where's my baby??

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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