Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

two elephants in a bathtub Elephant 1: pass me the soap Elephant 2: no, radio!

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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