What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

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What is worst then a blond trying to pass collage?....... There is nothin wrong with that

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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If you search "fat black man" on Google, you will find many reesults about black people who happen to be chronicly obese.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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