Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops