Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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