Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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FUCK YOU

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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