roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

whats red and hard to eat a brick.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

A pope meets another one

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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