whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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