Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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