What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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What did Osama say before he was shot? Nothing, it was a surprise attack.

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops