It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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i committed murder

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

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It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops