How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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