What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops