Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

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I am a mime

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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