a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

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Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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How types of people are there? One, we are the only homo sapiens.

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Neronism is based on the belief that respect and love for one self and ones opinions, combined with respect and love for the opinions of those which follow the same concepts, is the right thing to do. Now behold what religion has done, it spreads fear and poverty, demands the submission of free will and belief in oneself, which again leads to pedophilia, abuse and discrimination of women, abuse and hate, which breeds life to wars agony, suffering poverty and disease in the name of what defines love these days for some "might exist and be jealous and cruel God which loves you so much, that he gives you the option behind serving him or endless suffering..." Not to mention, this fear of eternal torment, being passed on for generation to generation, creating endless wars since the dawn of mankind. Know that we do consider outsiders inferior, but we do not hate you, we pity you, we will not make you suffer, as you due to your path, suffer enough already. Now ask yourself, if we are what you could say those that represent anti-religion, as we go on knowing this, we can not only do better than religion... ...But the hell if we can do worse! Moral: "We will not walk with pride into the light, we will not go into war against those we disagree with, instead we walk in the dark with humility and listen to our hearts and the one of others in order to find our definition of love and kindness... ...Otherwise Neronism would just be yet another fucking religion, and there is enough of that in this world already. If you listen then you know who I am in spirit, if not then you might have learned something new.

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 24

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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what did john boner say to the hor that was jewing his laundry want to sex my motherss twat?

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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