What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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