How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

how to turn invisable. eat yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why do I write Anit-jokes. Because I'm very bad at delevering good punchlines. They generally fall flat.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

thumb_up thumb_down -25

person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops