Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt.

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

Wow! I've seen this joke before!

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...