When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Jimmy Saville

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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