Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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How do you scare a black man? You dont

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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