What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Half life 3 confirmed

thumb_up thumb_down -16

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops