What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops