Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops